Moody Bitches Unite! It’s Time to Feel Our Feelings!

These days, women feel the pressure to “do it all”. We shoulder most of the burden at home, many while holding full-time jobs. Unsurprisingly, this leaves us feeling out of balance, and sends us seeking means to help us cope. Caffeine, alcohol, sleep aids, and antidepressants are being used more than ever before.

In her new book, “Moody Bitches”, psychiatrist Julie Holland contends that moodiness, “being sensitive, caring deeply, and occasionally being acutely dissatisfied,” can prove a natural source of power for women.

I recently had the pleasure of hearing Ms. Holland speak at the 2015 Mass Conference for Women in Boston. So taken by Holland’s description of what is happening to us as a medicated society,  I realized we are creating a new normal for ourselves, inadvertently causing the un-medicated among us feel inadequate.

Holland believes women need to experience normal mood flux, such as PMS, because the things we feel are real and need to be respected. If we allow ourselves to feel, think about what we are experiencing and speak our truth, every day stress can be reduced. Until you own up and process them, feelings don’t go away. Normal arguments that occur in daily life, such as marriage squabbles should be addressed, discussed and worked through to solution. Self-medicating, so we don’t “feel” those feelings is not the right way to handle conflict.

Here are a few other takeaways that I found interesting:

• 1 in 4 women nationally take a sleeping aid. It’s higher in places like Boston and NYC where the pace of life is a little faster.
• Medicines are not benign and drug companies want you to take your daily dose.
  • Ads are sexist and targeted toward women, psych meds
• We are not getting enough exercise. We have too much stress and are not getting basic things we need as animals such as physical touch
• Birth control pills are a wonderful tool for family planning but does not let the body naturally ovulate, which in turn lowers our libido – and regulates moods
• Meds prevent us and others from learning and growing, and working through conflicts. “We can’t clean if we don’t see the dirt.”
• Our environment is toxic to those still “feeling”. Those of us who medicate don’t feel how bad things are really getting.
• It is normal to be irritable and weepy a few days before our period. We need to experience PMS, and those real feelings need to be respected, not mocked. Again, we can’t clean if we don’t see the dirt. We need that different perspective to make a fuller picture.

Mental and physical health go hand-in-hand. Holland insists inflammation proves detrimental to our physical health and chronic sleep loss puts us in an “inflamed” state. Daily physical activity is integral to our health and well-being, as is eliminating “white” foods, and increasing our intake of probiotics, fermented foods, and fish oils. Isolation is also a stressor, and when your brain gets inflamed, it can’t do it’s job learning and building memories, which is why getting out for fun with friends and family proves truly good for you.

Perhaps by acknowledging and embracing our natural rhythms in life instead of masking and discounting our feelings, we can enjoy a better understanding of ourselves, appreciating that we are naturally emotional and logical beings.

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Erica Gatlin

Coffee-addicted marketing gal. Crunchy Mom to two littles and one teen. Connoisseur of all things celebrity & chocolate. Culinary scientist. Closet punk-rocker.